GAWTrip 2024

It’s never been a secret to anyone that I have a deep, professed love for Mackinac Island. The cooler temps, the glorious state park, brilliant flowers, beauty everywhere. The longest we’ve ever stayed on the island is eight nights. My dream was to go for longer, much longer.

So this year, I booked the room, made the plans, did the research and ended up on MI for 17 days. By myself.

Yes, by myself. Eek!

There was no way hubby could take off for that long (or that he’d want to be up there for that long), so against my greater fears and my worrisome mind, I made the journey alone. Twelve hours north, through several big cities, with audio books loaded and ready, I drove to MI.

The lilacs were still blooming when I got there.

Strange, wonderful and enlightening things to note:

*Checking into a hotel by myself was so odd…never done that before. But I’m 54, so onward we go!

*When you don’t have your people around you, you will start talking to strangers eventually. Even if you’re ultra quiet like me.

*I am not a foodie so that helped, but eating in a restaurant alone is different. Where are you supposed to look if there’s no view? You can’t ask a stranger for a bite of their meal to see if you like it! Phones come in very handy I found. I also ordered lots to go and ate in the courtyard where I stayed. The small but ultra efficient grocery store on the island was my savior.

*Some moments, I was perfectly relaxed and happy…other moments, I’d get a touch homesick. Still, the days whizzed by.

*I was drawn to the local library like a moth to a flame, spending time there each day it was open. I asked the librarian if she had any volunteer work I could do, and she looked at me like I had five heads. I just smiled and told her that if she changed her mind, I’d be around :).

*MI has a school, a medical center, a police department, and a laundromat. I (unfortunately/fortunately) visited each one, except for the school since it was closed. (UTI’s don’t wait, bikes can get “borrowed” overnight, and I don’t own 17 pairs of underwear!)

*I experienced my first bike wreck on the island (and since I was 10 years old). If you are alone in the woods, on a back trail forty minutes from town, and you wobble then crash, you can do miraculous things on your own – like pop a disjointed pinky finger back into place. All. By. Yourself. (I’m giving the credit to Jesus on that one. Anybody that knows me knows that I gag at the site of a loose tooth. Dislocated finger, forget about it. It was divine intervention.) Did NOT have to visit the medical center again – yay me.

*As much as you absolutely love being at your favorite place, you will miss your family. On day 14, I was there…missing Bill and the kids. Yes, it crossed my mind to leave early but there was this part of me that was determined to make it.

And then the most spectacular thing can happen. It did happen to my complete and utter surprise. On Saturday, day 14, Bill snuck up to the island. He didn’t tell me, no one told me, and I had the biggest surprise of my life. On a cold, rainy day, after hearing whistling over and over in the hall outside my room, I opened the door to find my wonderful husband dripping wet, his drenched suitcase sitting beside him, the most precious smile on his face, there to surprise me. Bill came up to spend the last three days on the island with me and then drive home together. Best Surprise Ever. As I wrote in my journal, “I spent two full weeks on MI alone. It was incredible, a dream fulfilled, but when Bill got here, every little thing fell right back into place. We’ll head home together on Wednesday.”

*A powerful sense of gratefulness swallowed me whole on the island, and has since followed me home. Being surrounded by God’s beauty centered me. Being alone for a while reminded me of my true focus. I will forever be thankful for this adventure, for what it showed me I’m capable of, for the love of family and friends who encouraged me to hit the road and go for it. My heart continues to overflow with love and happiness and thankfulness.

Normally, I would never sit at a bar by myself (I’m weird like that), but you will if you’re hungry enough! I met an amazing woman there. She was from Ohio and traveling alone as well. We talked about life, jobs, family…it was such a cool moment.

There’s nothing more beautiful than the woods on the island…

…except for the views of the water.

Tears and all – the best surprise ever!

We had to stay up way too late to see this sunset, but it was worth it.

Dave and Blanca – the best innkeepers! They are kind, wonderful people.

Squeezing in all the best places once my hubby arrived.

Beauty everywhere you look.

Joy and Wedding Bells

Look at those faces. They were babies. Little wee ones, and that’s how I remember them. When I look up suddenly, or a wedding ring on a left finger catches my eye and makes me lose my breath, I have to face the reality that these children are all grown up.

Grown up and married and no longer our babies. (Oh, but who am I kidding? Your children always stay your babies, right?)

Wedding bells rang this weekend, and my heart sputters every time I think of the joy I felt and still feel. You always hear that when your children are happy, you’ll be too. Maybe that was it. Or maybe it was just the excitement of the event. All I know is when I stepped into that church, the energy overwhelmed me. Smiling faces and piercing love swallowed me whole.

Family and friends brought that love, mixed in with the love of God I felt in our beautiful old church, and it was amazing.

Trey and Shelby are starting a life together, a life I pray has more joy than sadness, more hope than loss. Some sweet soul asked me about them over the weekend, and I admitted that they loved fiercely one minute but sometimes argued like brothers and sisters the next. The woman smiled and said, “That means they’re best friends, too.” And they are. Sometimes in a marriage, you need a best friend almost as much as you need a partner.

Even now, I’m weepy. Bill is too. So if you see us remember someone’s kind words and get misty-eyed, just know our emotions have been on a rollercoaster of gratitude and joy. And if a mushy song comes on the radio, especially one from the reception, and we blubber like babies, we’re okay! Just two sappy, getting older, grateful souls.

Thank you for the love. For every single one of you who hugged us, or said a kind word, or sent a smile and a wink; to every single person who said ‘I love you’ and helped us set up, clean up, dig out, and put away – thank you for your kindness and support. We adore you all!

Beanie’s Last Chronicle

I wish I could talk. Like seriously…just for five minutes. There’s so much I’d like to say.

First…even though it’s depressing…I would tell my people that getting old sucks, even for a dog. Maybe even more for a dog.

See, I’ve got this bad hip and some days it hurts really bad. But can I tell the lady that feeds me? Nope. Can I tell the man I love the most that I need some medicine? Nope. So I give them the puppy dog eyes (we came up with that idea, just so you know – it’s our best idea ever). I don’t beg for food (because when you feel like poo, you don’t feel like eating as much).

And my people love on me and give me my pill wrapped in the yummy cheese. But still… getting older is no fun!

Next, I’d beg them not to quit lovin’ on me just because I’m getting old. I heard my lady feeder/momma tell ole spoiled Princess Poo (who has a bad knee and is starting to get the glassy eyes) that she’d take care of us sickly girls forever. I do believe her.

If I could talk for five minutes, I would tell my man that I miss our horse rides and that I wish I could go just one more time. But that ain’t ever gonna happen unless they find a saddle for a 41 pound mixed Beagle with a very round tummy.

Then I’d say youth is wasted on the young!! Shouldn’t we be aging in reverse so the older we get the better we’d feel?? It’s just not fair that puppies get all the cuddles and all the energy!

The other day, I caught a whiff of the best smell evvva!!! Someone was at the fun place beside my house grilling burgers. My hound dog nose smelled the air, loving the hint of Heaven so close. Used to, I would’ve been down there lickity split. My momma lady was watching me wondering if I’d run off, but I didn’t. I just sat there and let my nose soak it all in. Then I went inside and got on my memory foam bed…sigh.

Getting old ain’t for sissies.

Our funny, sweet, one-of-a-kind Beanie!

Old Friends

I lost an old friend this past week; a friend I haven’t seen face to face in over thirty years, and even still, it was heartbreaking. Gut-wrenching really. She was still young (as far as I’m concerned, early 50’s is still young), and smart and so dang funny. And I can’t quite shake it.

So what is it that makes a heart hurt 30 years later? What is it about relationships that can stay with you so very long?

My heart squeezes and answers, “I loved her. I just loved her.” That’s all I know.

Senior year – Michelle, Leigh Ann, Lyn and Paige

You go to school with people for years, see them often, but then sometimes if you’re really lucky, you click with someone, and I clicked with Lyn. Her super sharp mind, her wit, that infamous side-eye that I can see in my mind as clear as if I’d seen her yesterday.

Back in the day, I had a dirt brown Chevy Chevette with no power steering. I swear the steering wheel was at least two feet wide. Some days it would run, other days I would pull the heavy, metal chisel Jeff gave me out from under my seat and beat the alternator to get it to start. I learned how to change tires on that car, and when we needed decent music, Lori would bring her boom box and perch it on the console.

Anyway, one day Lyn wanted to drive it home…so I let her. Of course I did…I mean, duh, why not? I’ll never forget her laughing the whole way, fighting that crazy steering wheel. We took one curve way too fast – I looked at her and thought oh crap – but she just laughed and kept going. We made it somehow, but I was reamed by several friends for letting her drive my car. They were like, “Didn’t you know she couldn’t drive??” Nope, didn’t know and she didn’t volunteer the info.

And all those nights sitting in the backseat of the Cat Wagon with Staci and Lori traveling to away games. Cheering at games, laughing, cheer camp, practice, dancing, friends…

But now, even all these years later…now that she’s gone and I can’t…I want to hug her one more time and say, “I hope you know I loved you. I hope you know that I’m sorry if I ever caused you a second of pain. I hope you know I never forgot you.”

I’ve heard it said that high school is the best time of your life. Uh, no! Not even close…having a family and a home and a fulfilling purpose way outrank high school. But honestly, there’s something about those years that never leave you. It must be the high emotions, the raging hormones, the trek from adolescence to adulthood, or the gut-ripping pain and regret when you hurt others (even when that regret helps you grow into a better person). It all comes along at such a blissful, crazy and uncertain time in your life and that leaves unforgettable impressions on your soul. People you love in school, those true childhood friends, never really leave you. Even when you don’t see them for years at a time.

Goodbye old friend, goodbye for now. Just know that I fully intend to hear your laughter again one day, and when I finally make it there, no side-eye for being late to the show!

Cheer Camp in Murfreesboro – (thanks to Staci for several of these pictures)

Beanie…the Best Girl Ever

Hi guys! Beanie here! Something exciting finally happened today, and believe you me, nothing exciting ever happens to me anymore. That’s what a bum leg and a round belly will get ya.

I’m going to be honest – this hasn’t been my best year. (But the way folks act around me, it might be that way for everybody, not just fluffy dogs. There’s lots of growling and grumpy and sighing these days. I think my humans are tired of this strange thing called 2020.)

Anywho, what have I been doing? Absolutely nothing. Just being lazy all the time. Sleeping here, sleeping there. My bum legs keeps me hobbling. My stupid diet keeps me hungry, as in hangry all the time. My humans snicker, say things like I’m ‘addicted to food.’ I think that’s mean.

Too bad it’s the truth.

Well, last week or last month, one of those times, my ear got that crazy tickle, itch, pain thingy. I’ve been doing the head shake for the woman who feeds me to see, so today she loaded me up and took me to the V.E.T. (Fellow howlers…don’t shake your head or you’ll wind up at the doctor!)

I’m not too proud to admit that I didn’t act my best. I’m usually cool, calm and relaxed, but not today. When the stranger took my halter to lead me away from my feeding lady, I laid down and threw a hissy fit. I yelped really loud at the stranger and let my belly cement me to the ground.

Know what my lady did? She laughed at me! Laughed! Told the stranger that I was a yelper. How rude.

Anyway, I’ve got an ear infection, and worst of all, they weighed me. Sigh. Gained a pound back and of course they told my lady. She’s not too happy with me. (But that didn’t stop her from giving me a good girl cracker when she picked me up.)

Two car rides, a yummy treat from the nurse lady and lots of ear rubs too. The nurse lady said I was the best girl ever…or something like that. Not a bad day. Any day I get extra loving is the best day ever.

I am the best girl ever!

Our Hearts Are Broken

Well, it’s official. And our hearts are broken.

School has been canceled for the rest of the school year, and we never got to say goodbye.

There were no last day of school hugs, no yearbook signings, no parties. There was no Field Day, no water day in the May heat, and no end of the year picnics. No ceremonies for our babies, no butterflies in the classroom, no closure.

And I speak for myself (and for many teachers and staff I know) when I say I’m utterly heartbroken.

Our babies at Pulaski Elementary are small. We’re so blessed to get them as sweet, young, little ones and then watch them flourish before they leave us at the end of second grade. They love us, and we love them. They need us every single day. Our babies love hugs and positive feedback. They love to be loved by us.

Our babies…

Are they okay? Most are.

Are they fed? Most are but not all.

Are they lonely and confused, scared by the sudden change in their routines?

Are they happy and learning? Is someone reading to them, turning on PBS during the day, cooking with them, showing them how to paint, playing Barbies?

I had someone ask me today if I was liking my time off. They truly expected me to say yes. But yes would be a lie, so I told them the truth. Some days I’m okay, most days I’m not. I’m not because I’m not doing what God put me on this Earth to do. I feel like I’ve lost limbs from my body.

Teachers teach, we love children, we worry. That’s what we do.

So until we’re back together again, prayers for our little ones. Many prayers for the seniors of 2020 and their parents and for every student in between. Prayers for love, safety, kindness, nourishment, hope and happiness for every child. Prayers for all parents and caregivers, and many prayers for our world.

 

Just a Barn

It was just a barn. A really old, leans to the right barn. None of us know how long it’s been on the farm…most likely a hundred years or so.

A barn full of hay, dirt floors and smells. Groundhogs lived under it, the horses filled the stalls, mice scurried for the feed, and the cows knew it was home base during feeding time. Just a very old building designed to make caring for God’s creatures easier.

It amazes me that a soul can get attached to a wooden structure, to a space created by man. A space inhabited by other people and animals for decades before this farm became ours.

We’ve been saying goodbye to the barn for the past month. When strong straight-line winds blew through our little farm in February, the barn took a hit. What had been already weak and feeble suddenly became irreparable. Admitting that it was too old to repair was hard. Deciding to have it pulled down was excruciating.

We’ve cried at the loss, even as we’re so thankful the house didn’t get damaged. We’ve said good-bye to this old building even as we know it’s nothing more than a man-made barn that was never meant to last forever.

It was just a barn, but still it was so much more. It was home and love and family and new life and friends. It sheltered livestock and critters, watched horses age and pass on. It sat stoically at the back of the farm, old and proud, gazing out over the fields. The barn was a regal old girl, part of our home and our lives. And never again will our little farm look or feel the same.

The first colt born in the barn about a year after we moved in.

Trey fell in love with horses early. He’s three in this picture.

The heart of the barn. So many haircuts given and horses saddled right here.

Good-bye old girl…

 

 

Friday and the 10,000 Shoe Strings

Friday’s here, and we all feel it. This unexplainable gratitude that somehow, someway we’ve made it to another weekend. Even though we work all day Friday, it feels different. Better. Easier. Because we’ve survived another week of work and stress and non-stop movement.

I tied my 10,000th pair of shoes strings this week. I kid you not.

Okay, I haven’t actually kept count, but it feels like it. Some days, most days it feels as if that is what I was put on this earth to do. Tie shoe strings.

Sigh. Most times I silently cringe. Sometimes I roll my eyes. But every single time, I squat down even as my knees scream and tie those (hopefully dry) shoe strings.

I do it because little children need me to.

I do it because little children need someone to look after them.

I do it because little children need to know someone cares enough about them to help when they need it.

We do it because God declared that each one of us (dads, moms, teachers, health care providers, public service workers, grandparents, friends, families, spouses…) are here to serve others.

To love others.

To help others.

To serve. Period.

So, instead of wishing my days away – instead of wishing every day was Friday, Lord help me love and serve and tend every single day of the week. Fridays shouldn’t be the only day we’re happy. Weekends shouldn’t be the only days we feel human and most like ourselves.

Work is work…not play, and most days, not easy. Lord, help me find my purpose in your work. Help me feel love and show love.

And thank you for every little body that fills in the shoes with the 10,000 shoes laces.

 

Beanie Goes Camping

Guess what, people? Just guess!

I got to go camping with my guys this weekend, and it was so awesome!

Honestly, at first I didn’t know what was going on. I mean they never let me go anywhere anymore since my hip hurts every day and I gained a little weight. No eye rolls please. I’ve been dieting (I hate that word) all summer, and just so you know, this girl is down about five pounds.

My hip still hurts though. My lady, the one who feeds me, thinks it’s the arthritis. I don’t argue because number 1 – how would I know? And number 2 – she’s usually right about everything (cough, cough).

Anyway…Friday night my guy takes Avi’s collar off and puts it on me. I don’t have a fancy collar like Avi’s anymore because…well…my other one got too tight for me. So, he puts Avi’s collar on my neck and bags up some of my ‘smancy’ diet dog food. And then! Then Saturday morning, he picks me up and puts me in the giant white truck.

I tried not to cry, but I got so excited. I cried most of the way to this place. And when we got there…whew. Trees everywhere, and dirt and sticks and horses and other people’s trash and a few nice people. And the nice people let me lean right up against their legs like I like to. You know that’s the best way to snuggle…just lean right in and let all your weight hold them still. They can’t move if you do that.

So, I got to snuggle and I got to eat lots of not diet stuff (don’t tell my momma lady). I even had BACON! Loves me some bacon. Best of all, I got to sleep in the bed with my guy, all snuggled up and everything. We both snore so we get along real good.

Camping was fun, but I got real excited when we bounced over the cattle gaps and I was home again.

My and me guy!

Beanie’s Day

Beanie here! It’s that time of year. You know…that lady who feeds me gets home from her disappearing place for a few days and wham, I suddenly have to go the doctor place.

Let me just say something…you know how sometimes you have a bad day or maybe even a bad year? Well, I’m a proud enough hound to admit times have been a little bumpy lately.

Used to, I would ride horses with my guy who I lub, luv, love. It was so fun, my very favorite thing to do in the whole wide world. My short legs racing through the woods. Smelling those squirrels. Following my guy up big humongous mountains (well…they were like mountains to me).

I can’t do that anymore, and let me just say, I cry every time I hear my guys jangly spurs and he has to leave me at home. See…when I was a wild pup I ran right out in the road and got smacked by a car. This gentle giant put me back together, and for years I was alright. I was great! Now my hip hurts all the time, and I can’t keep up.

But mom says my hip wouldn’t hurt so bad if I wasn’t so….

Oh, I can’t say it! It’s so humiliating and degrading.

She says I’m fat! Can you believe it?

Okay…deep breaths. Okay….

(Truthfully, she’s right. I can sort of admit it.)

So today we went to the doctor, and they poked me and cut on my toes and gave me shots. And they put me on the scale. Sigh…

The vet lady said I’ve gained nine pounds since last year and that I weigh 49 pounds! I demand a recount.

Anyway, my mom and the other lady put me on a diet. That’s what she said…d-I-e-t. And no table food and no treats! This all sounds like animal cruelty to me.

(I’m sad and I’m really good at pouting, just so you know. I can fall to the ground and become 49 pounds of dead weight in the blink of an eye.)

In my heart, I’m still awesome – you know, 49 pounds of rollin’ thunder! In real life, I’m 49 pounds of chocolate pudding. But just watch and see, this pudding will be rolling again soon!