Change

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Things change. And friends leave. Life doesn’t stop for anybody.”
― Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Doesn’t change suck?  Or does it?  I used to hate it…literally hate it.  My parents divorced when I was young, we moved a lot, and I developed a hatred for change early.  I hoarded that hatred through each move, each meeting of new friends, each tiny speck of different.

And then life decided that I needed a change whether I was a willing participant or not.  It literally picked me up by my feet and shook until all that was left were the roots of me, of who I am.  Not much was spared but what was left behind became even more precious. 

Something amazing happened in the process…I lost my fear of change.  I don’t necessarily crave it but I’m no longer afraid of an unknown future.  There’s still a yearn to control things around me but even that urge has lessened.  I am not in control.  Period.  And I’m okay with that.

It’s strange to crave change these days.  I have dreams…dreams of traveling more, of living in different places.  Writing, exploring, smelling different smells, stretching to see what’s just beyond my reach – things I yearn to do that would entail change.  It’s exciting to dream, to wonder, to imagine.  It’s exciting to not be worried about the unknown.  Yes, change happens, but life has taught me well that it doesn’t mean it’s the end…perhaps it’s only the beginning.

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